This week a woman embezzles nearly $1m from a Jazzercise company, nepotism strikes Pakistan, and the CBA may have helped launder money.

The Ponzi scheme involving Jay-Z. Kind of.

Cardis International has 99 problems and fraud might be one. The Long Island firm is being probed by the feds for claiming they were connected to rap star Jay-Z to help draw investors in, but a Jay-Z exec said, “Sorry, who are you?” While Cardis lured investors to pay $300,000, it was almost $3m in debt.

Richard Simmons is not amused.

A woman in California has been officially sentenced for embezzling $1 million from a Jazzercise company to help fund personal expenses, including a gambling habit. But big questions are still left unanswered, like, “Jazzercise is still a thing?” and, “No really, they had $1m to throw around?”

And the new PM is...

You may remember recently how Pakistan booted their PM for his family’s less-than-stellar financials. So to replace him, the ruling party decided to nominate…his brother. Makes sense. But days after his nomination, he’s already facing a $2 billion corruption charge. You know that old adage: fool you once, hire my little brother...

Danger, danger

Commonwealth Bank of Australia is under serious fire for possibly laundering money. It dispersed ATMs all over the commonwealth and then sort of forgot to check up on them, letting people deposit whatever they wanted without being monitored. The Financial Crime Agency noticed and gave CBA a heads up, but the bank dragged their feet with closing relevant accounts and now they’re paying the price.

Moving on up

Special Counsel Robert Mueller is widening the playing field with his Russia investigation—now it may include possible financial crimes not necessarily connected with the 2016 election. Trump says Mueller is crossing a red line by going after his finances, but that doesn’t seem to stop Mueller from moving ahead anyway.

Netanyahu suspected of bribery and fraud

PM Benjamin Netanyahu is suspected of two cases of bribery, fraud and breach of trust—confirmed by Israel Police on Thursday when it requested a gag order. The cases allege that a Hollywood producer bought luxury items for the PM and his wife, and that he tried to strike a deal with a daily news publisher.

Did businessman use cancer tech funds on personal expenses?

A Massachusetts businessman is getting some heat for potentially misusing a chunk of funds that were slated for pharma research. Instead of developing products to detect cancer, he spent nearly $400,000 on casinos and rent.

Thanks for reading! Keep your eyes glued to this column for another roundup of the latest news from the wider world of compliance. And as always, please send any questions, comments, or leads to katherine.ohara@complianceweek.com.

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